Prometheus (Ridley Scott)

I have no great love for the Alien franchise.  I had hoped going into this film that the "it is it isn't a prequel" debate was just hype surrounding the movie.  Nope it is totally a prequel.  The last scene proudly announces "Here's the first xenomorph.  I'm placing it right here."

I went to see it because I'd hope I'd see more cool alien architecture like in the trailer.  You instead see just the cool alien architecture from the trailer.  I'd hope I'd hear more of that nightmare bass screaming from the trailer.  Instead I got a lot of scenes with life affirming baritone while people said, "This could be answer to everything" over and over again.  Or a scene of great beauty with all that baritone.  Well the scene isn't that beautiful, but the android certainly ?appears? to find it enthralling. 

Also yo, David is an android and the movie takes every chance to remind you of this.  He's really the only character in the film.  The rest is really poorly-defined.  It seems to be a really polarizing film, but I'm on the camp of nothing on screen was interesting.  I frequently had to stop and look around the theater because, "Holy shit I can't be watching a film that came out in 2012 can I?"  The movie was constantly neverendly ripe for MST3000 riffing.  It's not that it's bad in a PsyFy original movie way.  It's just boring and a pile of scenes that don't seem really related to each other.  There's no strong narrative pull to it.  You're just watching this collection of images flash and wish that there was a cut of this movie that was great.  There probably is.  There's probably 30 minutes of deleted footage that they could put in and take other scenes out and rearrange the whole damn thing and it would be good.

The theory that Old Dude wants X so he gets random chuckleheads as fake pretense?  Awesome.  Perfect.  Totally works.  Doesn't make the film any more entertaining for me.

The whole film is pretty stupid and didn't show me enough pretty things.  I think a lot of the questions by people that hated the film are stupid.  Mostly the ones dealing with "the world".  That's stuff I can throw away in the favor of SPACE SHIPS AND ALIENS.  David (who is an android) totally knows everything that's going on and is just acting in parallel with everyone else.  They could have made that everything else more interesting.  Apparently it's not obvious what android David was to most people, so they get to concentrate on useless questions like "What was the different goo" not "Holy shit why did they have the 'father' line?"

It was a dumb dumb film.